This Blog contains themes and discussions of an adult nature!

You can find me at
I finally embraced technology and joined Twitter @99emmabound99

Please note, my blog contains themes and discussions of an adult nature. If you are easily offended by that please do not read any further!


Sunday, 26 December 2010

If Santa Answered His Mail Honestly

These cracked me up.
I hope Santa brought you naughty boys and girls out there in Bondageland everything you desired this Christmas. For the Bah-Humbug brigade that dont much like Christmas, I'll be posting a few bits and pieces in the next few days that should make you smile too.
Emma x

Deer Santa, I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. I'v ben a gud boy all yeer.
Yer Friend, Billy

Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawncare. How about I send you a book so you can learn to read and spell? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell.

Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody! Love, Sarah
Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?

Dear Santa, I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do. Love, Teddy

Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me send you some Legos instead.

Dear Santa,
I want a new bike, a Playstation 2, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba.
Love, Francis

Dear Francis,
Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're gay. I'll set you up with a Barbie.

Dear Santa,
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.
Love, Susan

Dear Susan,
Milk gives me the shits and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of Scotch.

Dear Santa,
What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?
Your friend, Thomas

Dear Thomas,
All the toys are made in China . I have a condo in Vegas where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table. Hey, you wanted to know.

Dear Santa,
Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?
Love, Jessica

Dear Jessica, Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house.

Dear Santa,
I really want a puppy this year. Please, please, please, PLEASE, PLEASE could I have one?
Love, Timmy

Dear Timmy,
That whiney begging shit may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again.

Dearest Santa,
We don't have a chimney in our house. How do you get into our home?
Love, Marky

Dear Mark,
First stop callling yourself "Marky", that's why you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don't live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom window.
Sweet dreams,

Friday, 24 December 2010

Happy Christmas

Some Christmasy tied gals to warm the cockles over Christmas.

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

T'was The Week Before Xmas Emma's Tied Up In The House . . .

T'was The Week Before Xmas, Emma's Tied Up In The House . . .
Ropes Were Tied Tight; Ball-gagged, She Squeeled Like A Mouse!

Okay enough of all that poetry lark! I've just had an intense little bondage session. Well I say little but it lasted over an hour.

Because of the snow and Peter saying "Sod it. I am working from home today" I had the pleasure of his company all day(22 Dec). He shovelled a bit of snow off the drive this morning and then got down to it. He didn't even stop for lunch.

Then about half past three, he asked me to come up to the bedroom. He had laid out three belts, the handcuffs, a small spreader bar and the 1 3/4 inch ball gag with the wide strap. It's the one that really makes me drool all over the place.

He had put on the central heating and told me to strip. I hate the cold in winter so started to moan about it, when he told me I would be put in nipple clamps if I didn't hurry up. He is so bossy when he gets a Dom on, lol.

So I quickly stripped out of my jeans and my jumper until I was left in my bra and panties. Then he told me to take them off too. I shivered in the cool bedroom but heard the radiator kick in to life and that cheered me up a little.

Peter told me to sit in the middle of the bed. He the threw the leather leg cuffs at me and told me to put them on. I buckled them up and then he tossed the small spreader bar in front of me and told me to padlock it to the D rings of the cuffs. Once I had that locked in place he told me to turn around and kneel with my back to him. He inspected the cuffs and then he tightened them up another notch. I squealed a bit as the cuffs pinched, then eased; as the buckle moved into the next hole and the pressure eased off sightly.

He threw me a belt and told me to place the belt into a welded metal ring and then to tighten it around my waist. Next up he tossed me two small suitcase wraps that I use for frog-tying, and he told me to make sure that I tightened it up properly this time! I made a ring and slipped my thigh and calf into this, kneeling down, and pulled the strap tight. Peter was watching me so I pulled it as tight as I could and then did the other leg.

He had the handcuffs in his hands and was fitting a padlock through the nearest link of the chain next the cuff, then he did the same with the other side shortening the links in the chain, so there was almost no give. He tossed them to me and told me to padlock this to the ring at the small of my back, just like they were.

I heard the lock snap closed with unmoving finality. I could feel how short they were and I would have no "reach room" like handcuffs give you when used the normal way.

"Do you want me to cuff myself." I asked him.

He threw me the gag and told me to make sure it was tight. I really hate this gag. It's a lovely fit, but somehow the wider strap presses the ball way behind the teeth so your lips are pressed against your teeth giving you a permanent toothy smile. Then it's just "drool central" until you can take the thing out.

I really hate drooling on myself. I think its erotic when looking at bondage photos, but then it's not me that is being dribbled on. Peter knows this, which is why he uses this gag on me so often.

"That's it, you can pull it another notch." So I did. "Now hands behind your back and cuff yourself. And make sure the cuffs are snug and not loose or you will get the clamps on your nipples."

I had to fiddle to do it but made sure they were not to tight, but not loose enough to get my wrist out. Peter checked them and nodded approval.

He picked up the two remaining belts and tightened one under my breasts pinning my arms to my back, and then the other one just above my breasts, which just went to squash them between the two belts.

"Now wriggle to me and come get the key." He dangled it in front of me. So I tentatively edged forwards, I was lucky I was on a nice soft mattress, as being on a floor is pretty hard going on your knees. I edged around the bed quite a number of times but Peter kept moving slightly farther away and by now I was drooling all down my chin and onto my breasts and the belts.

The spreader bar allowed a small side to side movement but it was hard on the bridge of my feet as they kept getting pinned under the weight of my thighs as I tried to edge forward in the frog-tie. I thought this tie was easy at first but it sure as hell wasn't once I was moving about!

All the weight presses down on the tops of your Tarsal and Metatarsals so you are forever wriggling your foot around to get comfortable. I tried sitting, leaning to one side, resting on my thigh and buttock with my feet pointing the opposite way, but realised I would have to spend effort to get upright and moving again.
The weight could be supported by my hands but the cuffs were digging into my wrists, and when I did this and I could only reach the bed with finger tips to push myself up. The belts pinning my arms were tight and I had no give to use elbows or upper arms as a support. It was an surprising effort to try to sit on my bum; trying to push the spreader bar fully under my bum. I just about managed to edge it forward enough to do it but the straps frog-tying me were a severe hindrance.

I sort of fell onto my back, and again any support from my hands made the cuffs dig into the wrists. I rolled onto my side not wanting the cuffs to click on my wrists tighter, and had to pull the spreader bar back under my bum and use it to pull myself upright again by pulling it as far back to my ankles while also trying to throw myself forwards to sit upright.

I decided that I had had enough of the position, and huffing and puffing I tried to lean far enough forward to fall on my stomach and ease myself into a sort of hogtie position. The trouble with all that was the effort and the huffing and puffing was now making me drooling all over the place. It was now running down my stomach and between my thighs. Just leaning a few inches forward and it was flowing out of my mouth!

Looking back on it now, I believe Peter had sat down and tried to work out just what a horrid position he could make me get into, so I was doing enough to be in discomfort but would have to endure it to be freed.

He pulled me upright onto the bed and ran his hand down my wet belly and over my pussy and slipped his fingers into me and kneaded away on my clit with his thumb until I shuddered to climax, crying out into the gag. He stood up on the bed facing me, dropped his trousers and pants shoving his cock in front of my face. I could smell his musky smell. (Well who couldn't if a guy waves an already excited cock right under your nose!)

He reached down and rubbed his hand under my chin wiping my drool and the scent of my orgasm over the gag and my mouth then he wiped it between my breast and started to fuck his cock between my breasts. After a few minutes of him grunting away, he got off the bed twisted me around and released one of the ankle cuffs so freeing me from the spreader bar. He pushed me down on the bed and pulled me to the edge, by my ankles, dragging the bed covers along with me. He shoved his cock into me and roughly fucked me until he made me orgasm again, before he shot his come to mix with my own drool and orgasmic juices.

I had to lay there for a few minutes to get my breath back before Peter came over with a warm soapy sponge and un-cuffed unbuckled the frogtie straps and removed the gag. As it popped out of my mouth, drool flowed down my face and over my breasts again leaving a streamer like trail of drool that hung between my chin and the ball of the gag. He reached out catching it and annoyed the hell out of me by wiping it and the dribble on my chin all over my face. Then he gently washed my face and body down with the sponge and dried me off.

He should work from home a lot more often. And I didn't have to wear nipple clamps either. Hooray.

Happy bondgage.
Emma x

Tuesday, 21 December 2010

Christmas Jokes.

Click on little Johnny's letter to Santa to see what he wrote.


Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

"In honour of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.

"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."

Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "These are Carols."

And So The Christmas Season

Hope you liked the Xmas jokes. I'll be a little to tied up this afternoon to write anymore for now. I'll tell you all about it later.

Emma x

Friday, 17 December 2010

Christmas Kangaroo as told by Hugh Jackman.

This one should go down as a Christmas classic.
In Australia we have our presents delivered by the Christmas Kangaroo on Christmas Eve. Here is Hugh Jackman,("Huge Ackman" as I like to call him) telling all the girls and boys about it.

Emma x

Thursday, 16 December 2010


For all my French friends out there in bondageland, you will get this. The gentleman is nattering away to us, when the sign language girl goes nuts.
Emma x

Tuesday, 14 December 2010

Alternative Christmas Carols

This one made me laugh. It's to the tune of "Deck The Halls With Boughs of Holy"

This one is called "Oh Christmas Tease".

Emma x

Monday, 13 December 2010

Santa Kinky Christmas BDSM

Well It seems I have blown out two interviews this and last week, but as another cold spell is on the way, and another two feet of snow for my leaking flat roof. It seems just as well.
People dont want to employ you, saying that you are over qualified for a job!
That makes me angry. Why dont they realise that as I am unemployed and cheap as I am out of work, that's a good reason in itself to hire people like me for short to medium term contracts! Anyway, that's the rant out of the way.

As its nearly Christmas I found a little Santa ditty on you may enjoy. Cheered me up after the above.
Emma x

Friday, 10 December 2010

I think Mummy is Santa . . .

Six Ways to Tell Santa is a ManHe shows up late
Eats your cookies
Empties his sac
Only cums once
Calls you a Ho
And leaves while you're sleeping!

Wednesday, 8 December 2010

Top Ten Ways Christmas Has Changed Due to the Economy...

I have to say that I love Christmas.
What I cant stand is the shops have been getting ready for it since the beginning of November and even before in some instances. I know they have to plan their displays and order in a load of stuff, but why have it out for us so early?

Well that's the Bah Humbug bit out of the way until next time.

I did come across a few amusing titbits on the various websites I trawl, and will be linking the odd one or two for your amusement. The first was by the Wet Spots a few days ago with a little ditty called "Fist me this Xmas". Not bad hey? And who said Canadians weren't funny and witty people? I know they are as I lived there a little while.

Now here is something I picked up on about the economy being shot to bits and how we will have to economise this Xmas.

10) Twelve Days of Christmas now down to ten and a half.
9) "Ho, Ho, Ho" replaced by exasperated sigh.
8) Three out of eight maids a milking on unemployment.
7) Yule log has to last all year.
6) Frosty the Snowman now a depressed, melancholy s...oul.
5) Letters to Santa include resumes.
4) Tinsel recycled for cash.
3) People hoping to get coal in case gas gets shut-off.
2) Out of town company staying through next Christmas.
1) Getting a meat and cheese assortment or fruitcake, not such a bad gift.

Monday, 6 December 2010

The Wetspots - Fist me this Xmas

A genius Christmas song to cheer you all over a cup of Eggnog and the mince pies this Christmas holidays.